Blogging? Sleep? I don't even know....
So evidently I’m some kind of literary megastar…and by that
I mean the stats on my blog homepage shows someone besides my mom checked it
out yesterday. I guess that means I’ll actually have to start editing this
sucker a little more carefully (as in I’ll have to start editing it, period). I
have the typing skills of an advanced lab chimp and my spelling abilities aren’t
even that good so I’m not making any promises.
Even though the content might have the grammatical and
spelling errors of something written by an 8th grader, once you
delve into it I think I might actually have some fodder for good blogging
content. This is not a narcissistic “Ah-ha!”
on my part but rather something I figured out when talking to a friend yesterday.
She and I were chatting about my shallow foray into blogging and she goes, “Wow,
that must be really difficult. I feel like good writing is really personal and I
think it would be hard to tap into that.” Que light bulb moment for me because although
I might not have world-changing topics to discuss here, I am the QUEEN of
over-share and it does not bother me one iota to get heavy-deep-and-real real quick
with folks I don’t know. A fact that I think embarrasses my husband on a
semi-frequent basis.
Mind you, not that everything I want to write about it
heavy-deep-and-real. Most of the time, as I have said before, I start writing because
I’m going to want my kids to have some stories from their childhood and I know
I’m not going to remember them without some help. My memory has always been
gnat-worthy but I find over the last 6 months it has diminished in capacity
even further. I blame this wholly on my youngest child.
She is a beautiful, sweet child with the prettiest smile. I
tell everyone Big Girl will be the trail blazer and Little Girl will be
following behind her putting out fires ; I think that is true to their personalities.
Recently however, I have begun to
question this observation as ‘putting out fires’ would require Geggs to peel
herself off me. Turns out she doesn’t think that is a good idea…ever. Honestly,
during the day she will be happy as a clam for about 20 minutes in her command
center (exersaucer) and smiling to put the Gerber baby to shame. Minute 21 rolls
around and Katie bar the door. Napping in the day isn’t terrible as most of the
time she falls asleep in her car seat in I can just lug her around in that
until she wakes up but it’s the nights. The nights are the worst.
I guess I came into this thinking she was gonna be like her
big sister and sleep through the night at 4 months old and so that is my own
dumb fault. With Geggs I am up every 3 hours latching her on just to reassure her
I am still there. She wakes up screaming to beat the bands and I’ll have to
nurse her to sleep, even though she’s not nursing, just kinda laying there with
her face pressed into my chest. If I try to pull away or roll onto my right
side, she wakes up in mad, angry fits, wailing until I put her back on. I have
grown accustom to letting my top half freeze at night since I can’t use a
blanket because then my easy, sweet baby girl would smother and although I
admit to having fantasies of rolling her up like a taco and putting her in the
corner of the room and just letting her cry herself to sleep, smothering her is
not on my list of things to do.
Honestly, come to our house. In the master bedroom there and
queen-sized bed that Geggs is gracious enough to let D and I lay on beside
her. I don’t say “use” because the primary function of a bed is to sleep and
that my friend, is a thing of the past. And if you do choose to come to our
house, please bring a heavy bat. That way when you see I’m not lying, you can take
mercy on me and hit me over the head. At least then I’ll get to be knocked out
for a couple of hours and sleep. Just be careful with your aim, ‘casue I’ll definitely
still be holding Geggs.
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